winnieamini's Xanga

~ WHAT IS THIS I FEEL?!?!

Tue, 05 May 2009 07:04:40 GMT

What is this I feel?
Can't seem to figure it out.

Thought it should be mutual,
But nay, it seems to be turning brutal.

The heart seems to be sinking, rather than singing,
It seems sorrowful, rather than Joyful.

Why should it be so?...I keep thinking.
When it all started, I could hear my heart ringing
Like the sound of the ancient church bells, it was jingling.

My heart tells me it's for real,
But somehow I'm not sure I'm ready for the deal,
For to accept the deal, will require a seal.

She does not say the words,
But her actions...they improvise for her lack of words.

Her words indicate lack of interest,
But her actions....Oh! They betray her interest.

I've got to be patient, she seems to say,
For my emotions I want not to sway.

What is this I feel, I repeatedly ask
It sure has been an endless task
Oh Lord! Rescue me from this clueless mask!!!

WHEN LOVE ACHES!!!
xoxo

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 12:35:40 GMT

~ WHY DO MOST GUYS SEEM TO BE SO SCARED OF COMMITTMENTS???

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 13:36:43 GMT

Okay today I was opportune to have a chat with one of my friends from Bahrain who left my Uni on mobility to our Mother Uni in the UK (Nottingham). It was a wonderful time, after so long.... We seem to have had a lot to talk about, so we started with talks about studies and exam results, then all of a sudden we didn't realize when we got into personal stuffs.

Now we got into talks of what next after Uni, and for now, his own plans for the future seem to be 1) Make good grades, 2) Get a good job, 3) Buy his dream Piano, 4) Get a Porsche. This is what he defines as settling down. I was kinda astonished to see that he never had any plan like "Get a wife and have babies". He even spotted that out before I could even think of asking the question.

For him, there's more to life than getting settled with a wife and having kids. He just doesn't know why that's one thing that he finds so difficult to think of. Now don't get me wrong, life isn't all about marriage, but it really was surprising to hear that he had such opinion. "What if I just have friends and forget about having a wife?" He said, My response "Friends will not be around all the time. Besides, friends might decide to get married!!!" But then, his response is that marriage isn't one of his priorities, and he hasn't even met anyone he can consider yet....

Well, he has his points, but our disussion today keeps me thinking about so many guys who might share the same opinion....or even stronger ones like his. I'm really wondering, why is it that most guys seem to be so scared of committments??? Why do they seem to freak out when the topic raised is MARRIAGE???

I guess the guys will be in a better position to answer this question.

XOXO.

~ UPDATE!!!

Sat, 24 Jan 2009 13:23:11 GMT

Been away for 3days & 2nights...Was at Malaysia Bible Seminary, Rawang for my Uni's Christian Fellowship Camp. It was a very wonderful experience, as we all had fun playing and fellowshipping with each other.

I wish I could give details of it, but I can't right now. I'll just add photos to my album, hoping that that will do. Feeling a bit light-headed after something that happened today. I hope to be able to document it later when I feel better. For now, I need more of God's grace to guide me through my current state.

Got to go to bed now. Not feeling too strong.

~ WOW! WHAT A MEMORABLE DAY!!!

Wed, 21 Jan 2009 14:50:00 GMT

Today is one of the days I'll never forget. Went out with 2 of my close friends (GT &IB). We needed time and space to catch up, so I suggested the outing, and ensured that it was only the 3 of us that went out.

We spent the whole day at Berjaya Times Square, Kuala Lumpur. The trio set out as early as 12:30pm, so we could have enough time outside before the night came. We were at Kenny Roger's Roasters for lunch, then to Como's World Theme Park for some fun, after which we had dinner at KFC, then went on to watch a movie at Golden Screen Cinemas.

It was my first time trying KRR, and I must say I think I like their food too, but not to be compared to my NANDOS. NANDOS spices are so "Unique". From KRR, we went on to get movie tickets, and amongst the movies for that day, we all felt "YES MAN" was a very good choice, so we got the ticket for it, and had to spend the next 4hrs + at the Park and waiting for 7:10pm since this was the time the movie would be showing.

Our experience at the park is one of the many things that makes this day a memorable one. We got the chance to get on the roller coaster there, tried the Car Ride, and also the DNA Mixer. The Entry Ticket price was pretty expensive - RM38 per person (Adult price), datz about 11USD per person, so we paid RM114 for the 3 of us. The roller coaster experience was cool, and so was the Car ride. However, the DNA Mixer spoiled the day, coz not only was it a very dangerous ride where we were tossed about in very weird directions, but also the tossing was done for longer than usual...Can't really figure out why the guy made it that way for us. At the end of it, we were so dizzy that we couldn't get to play any other games, plus IB threw-up because she felt so dizzy that she couldn't help it. We went on for Dinner at KFC, and then to the movies. The movie choice was perfect for us. YES MAN - Starring Jim Carrey is such a lovely movie. We really enjoyed it.

We all got back home at about 11:30pm, feeling exhausted but happy that our day went well. Indeed it was a memorable one. I'll add the photos to my album as soon as I can, but for now though I feel really exhausted, I've got to go on and do my packing for CF Camp 2moro. I hope it's going to be fun too.

~ PLANS TO RELIEVE BOREDOM!!!

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 12:48:00 GMT

Finally exams are over, and the next I find myself thinking of is what to do for the next 1week break. Not that it's a lot of time, but there seems to be many things I want to do within limited time. Well, I've already planned an outing with two of my very close friends. It's been a long time we spent time alone with each other, and we seem to be getting more distant away from each other as the days go by. I'm thinking it's going to be some fun time for us, since we'll be having lunch and dinner outside, and we'll be going to the fun park...Well, let's see how it goes. The main idea is for us to have fun while hanging out, and to be able to reminiscence of the good old times. I'm really looking forward to it, and I know that it's going to turn out fine.

The rest of the break will be spent in a camp, and in other places I haven't yet figured out. Can't wait to have fun!!!

~ WHY DO GUYS TEND TO BE POSSESSIVE?!?!?!

Sun, 18 Jan 2009 12:18:05 GMT

I've been pondering on this question, but it seems to be rhetorical to me...Haven't been able to figure out an answer for it...Why do most guys tend to be possessive....Now, don't get me wrong, but I think this is the opinion or will I say conclusion I have reached after several experiences with some close friends who are guys...

I've got a lot of male friends...not because I'm so interested in guys, but because I find myself being more comfortable hanging out with guys...I kinda shy away from hanging out with girls coz of some "girly stuffs" that I can put-up with. Don't mis-interprete what I'm trying to say, I'm in no way a T-Boy...I'm just free-minded around guys, and that's all about it....

Now to what makes me see guys as possessive, I realize that a high percentage of my male friends act jealously when they see me with some other guy (even if the guy is no stranger to them). Funny thing is, I keep wondering, why is it so?? I'm in no way in a serious relationship with any of them, and I don't intend to be coz i'm not looking out for one....I try to interprete their gestures in the mildest way that I can, but I find it difficult to. Sometime ago, I had no choice, but to take out time to ask some of them personally, and to my utter surprise, they all had the same thing to say about it. Here's the conclusion "If a guy loves a girl, He'll not be happy if he sees that she seems to be very comfortable with another guy". Now the "being comfortable" has nothing to do with being in a serious or even flirty relationship with the guy in question.

Now to the other side of it, most of these guys actaully want to mix-up with all the other girls, but do not want the girl they hold dear to their heart to mix-up with other guys. They want to know the girl's every move, but do not care to tell her where they go all the time (sometimes they do, at other times they don't).... To me, this is pretty "Ironical", and difficult for me to put up with. Do guys really think "it's a man's world"? Shouldn't ladies have a say sometimes?? I'm not so much of a Jealous lover (at least I know). I believe in allowing my man do whatever he feels is best for him, as long as it's not "illegal"...I mean in my own terms. So why on earth would a guy not want to see a girl he loves happy? Why would he always feel that there is something wrong with her hanging out with other guys??? I really get freaked out, coz I'm still trying to get a concrete answer to it!!!

So the question remains..... "WHY DO GUYS TEND TO BE POSSESSIVE???"

~ AUCTIONING VIRGINITY???

Sat, 17 Jan 2009 14:06:00 GMT

It's really very disappointing to see what this world is turning into...Just recently, I read this post on Fox News that talks about a 22-year-old girl who is auctioning her virginity for $3.7million...Now datz really hilarious you might say, but I think there is more to it.

Now, come to think of it, I really wonder what on earth would make her do that...I mean, if she has manged to stay that way to this extent/age (after all so many people get to lose their virginity at an age earlier than that), then why can't she remain that way until she meets Mr. Right?

Well...well, different people have their own opinion about issues of virginity...but for me, I find this really humiliating. No matter how desperate one may be for money, or whatever reason it is, I don't think auctioning one's virginity online should be an option...Now that's my opinion okay??

I believe there a lot of people, especially girls out there who wish they hadn't lost their virginity...especially when they think of the person to whom they gave it out....talk more of if it has to be a stranger....I mean someone who gets the information online and bids for it...Well, like I said, this is still my opinion...I believe everyone is entitled to their opinion...But, I'll love to ask this question to you who is reading this blog entry....What do you think about this? What'z your opinion about this auctioning of virginity online???

P.S: To see original story, click here http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,480037,00.html

~ EXAMS...FINALLY!!!

Thu, 08 Jan 2009 12:44:00 GMT

Exams have finally started....Had my first paper today! How was it??? Well, it was supposed to be very good, except that there were a lot of mistakes in the typing or will I say the setting of the questions. Can't really tell who made the mistake (whether lecturer or typist).... Lecturer didn't come to make the necessary corrections on the questions until over an hour into the exam...probably that was when he was called by the invigilator...can't really tell....

Almost everyone was freaked out coz lecturer's presence didn't make any much difference. It only made Us get angrier at the end of the day. After the exam, there was a suggestion that everyone in class should write to the Dean of Faculty, reporting the case of the exam papers to him. So many reasons why it was right to do so:

1. The questions didn't seem like they were proof-read before they were printed.

2. When he was called to come and make corrections on the questions, he did it specifically for those who called him to their side, rather than for the whole class to hear. With this, those who didn't get the opportunity to call him to their side ended up answering the questions using the values(supposedly wrong) they saw on the paper....

3. The mistakes in the questions reminded us of how disorganized this lecturer had been throughout the semester...never giving us lecture notes that were well-structured, Coursework had a lot of formatting errors, and he even had to modify one of them, and extend deadline coz of modification.

4. We were not given the opportunity to evaluate lecturers at the end of the semester....rather we were asked to evaluate the module...Was this what we needed to do??....NO! Not at all...I mean who gives a damn about the module....It's the lecturer that makes the module what it is for the students...the impression comes from the efficiency or will I say competency of the lecturer.

Well, what did I do about it? I felt it would be better I send a mail to the lecturer instead, and CC Dean of Faculty. Better that way, so it doesn't feel like we are blackmailing him, and also, so that the Dean will be aware of the situation at hand....

Hmmm....I'm waiting for a response from him..Hopefully he'll put the mistakes made in the questions into consideration when marking the scripts, else we stand chances of losing a lot of marks.... Well..., the rest is in God's hands!!!

It is well!!!

~ Gearing up!!!

Sat, 03 Jan 2009 13:18:00 GMT

Yeah! It's Saturday again...And what did I do today...emmm....let's see...I did practically nothing for self. Had to go to Church earlier than usual for camp planning committee meeting, and then for Worship team Practice. It was really a hectic one for me, especially because I went to bed pretty late last night...or will I say at the dawn of this morning, and had to be up before 11am, and prepare to set out for church at 12:30pm. Well, what do I say...It's God's work, and that's why I cannot just hold back from doing what pleases Him besides, I'll be excused of duties in worship team until after my exams. Not that I'm so looking forward to it, but I think it's a wise thing to do, so that I can prepare adequately.

Yay! I'm counting down to the start of my 1st semester's exam. How do I feel??? Emmm....I really can't tell... Got some mixed feelings especially because I'll be sitting for 5 modules, and I really haven't done much in terms of preparations. I'm trusting God for the best anywayz, I know He'll make all things work according to His plans...

I'll be doing a lot of studying for the next 3weeks. Can't wait to be done with the exams. Well, I'll just gear up, keep my fingers crossed, do all I need to do, and trust God for the rest....